There are some days where you just need some inspiration. I have this in my house, and ever so often I turn and look at it because it reminds of me of where I am going, and how far I have come.
After my accident I got really depressed and this is probably the first time I have really shared this on my blog. I stayed away as much as I could from anyone willing to be close to me. I am not a person that likes to fail and at that point I felt like I did. I also felt very alone because I almost lost my life.
I remember waking up and not being able to breathe, I pannick but remembered to stay calm. I thought someone was dead, "what did I do". Despite my injuries being the person I am, I still was able to make sure the other person in there car was okay.
Through that experience I learned that people can be so cold, not that I did not know that before. I just remember thinking she did not care to check on me but was more concerned with her car. It did not matter to her whether I was alive or dead, she ran around her car more concerned for metal.
Now I am not saying that you should not be concerned for the things you have but I truly believe that materialistic things will not be forever. Someone's life is much more important than a car. I decided am no longer doing anythig half-ass am doing it t perfection. I have decided if I cant get my event right I will postpone it because I wont settle for less. I am not going to have it do but not in a half-ass way (excuse my language). If you have dreams, you have to give it your all.
I guess am sharing this because for the last few days I have been so down, everything is moving so slowly for me building a business, all the things I want to accomplish. I feel like when will it pay off but am trying to be so patient. I am trying to really figure out what to do with my life, crazy I do so many things, how can I focus on one. Well, am back making music so if that takes off I 'll be happy but am happy writing, I'll get it right eventually I will.
I even got frustrated with my hair almost cut it all off, but I wouldnt do that again, am happy with the results am getting. I dont know why I feel so low or what I can do to bring me back up but to write. I recently started writing for a online magazine but when I checked my articles they were not posted. I mean it's been weeks and am a quick writer. I say whats on my mind I have well thought out articles done in no time, because it's what I love to do so it's natural to me now, second nature.
Besides that I have had other drama to deal with and am just trying not to have any enemies or hard feelings so am being the bigger person when it has nothing to be with me, life is just to short for it all so I said forgot it I will handle it myself.
So now am sitting on my leather couch and am thinking about so many things, I know this may come across as so depressing but I just want you all to know I have down days too jus like you. Someone said I always seem so happy I am, am happy to be alive and healthy, happy to have family. I should not be complaining but it was not always this way. I have had a rough life but it made me a much better person.
I want you all to know that you can never give up on your dreams, you can never let anyone take them away from you. Work hard for the things you want in your life and hopefully eventually it will pay off for you. Dont look at what anyone else has, you dont know how they got it or what they had to do to get there. Try to keep positive people in your life and around you. Remember family, good family is better than any stranger.... sometimes. It does not take away from the amazing angel strangers that may walk into your life. Be positive, sometimes this is hard but people respond well to positive people. Be human, be kind, sensitive, loving, caring, forgiving, it's okay to ake mistakes, fall in love, dis like someone you're human. Remember to do onto others as you would want them to do unto you.
For now that's all I could go on and on but i'll end it with this NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP